A dessert so sweet, it’s the best thing

My son recently played some pop hits with his band class for Valentine’s Day. When I asked him the names of the songs, he couldn’t remember, and started humming a tune I didn’t recognize. As someone who keeps up with trending music, I was confused. He, on the other hand, prefers digitized, lyric-free tracks — video game music — and never listens to popular music. After some back-and-forth, I finally recognized the well-known love song, one that probably everyone in the world knows.
I told him, “That tune you were humming doesn’t really match the song.”
He shrugged. “Well, I’ve never heard it before.”
Having played the piano since childhood, I suggested that if he’s going to learn a song, he might want to listen to it first — it helps to understand the final product. He rolled his eyes at my advice.
A few days later, while searching for a dessert to bring to a meeting, I stumbled upon something called “The Next Best Thing to Robert Redford Dessert.” I’d never heard of it, and after glancing at the ingredients — a mix of box pudding, Cool Whip-based cheesecake, and a crumbly crust — I was skeptical. How could such a simple, no-bake dessert be worthy of such a lofty (if outdated) name?
I mentioned it to a friend, saying how odd I found this search result, and she informed me that it’s a common dessert for barbecues and potlucks on the continent.
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“Everyone has had it,” she said.
“Oh?” News to me. “Is it really that good?”
“Yes. You should try it.”
After scrolling through variations, I realized this dessert is surprisingly similar to chocolate haupia pie — sans coconut. That caught my attention. Maybe there was something there. So, with a few updates, I made my own version of this pan dessert. And you know what? It’s pretty good.
My only issue with it? With minimal crust and semi-liquid layers, it falls apart. I brought a slice to my friend, commenting that it was a mess.
She laughed. “Well, it’s supposed to be. Maybe you should have had it once before you made it.”
Touché.
The Best Thing Since Chocolate Haupia Pie Dessert
Crust:
• 1 cup chopped macadamia nuts
• 3 tablespoons sugar
• 1/2 cup butter, melted
• 1 cup flour (I used a gluten-free blend)
• 1/2 teaspoon salt
Cream Cheese Filling:
• 8 ounces cream cheese, at room temperature
• 1 cup powdered sugar
• 1 cup heavy whipping cream
• Pinch of salt
Haupia Filling:
• 1 1/2 cup milk
• 5 tablespoons cornstarch
• 1 13.5 ounce can coconut milk
• 3/4 cup sugar
• 1/2 teaspoon salt
• 1 cup semi-sweet chocolate chips
• 1 cup heavy whipping cream
• 3 tablespoons sugar
• Mini chocolate chips or chocolate shavings for topping
Directions:
Preheat the oven to 350 degrees. In a mixing bowl, combine the macadamia nuts, sugar, butter, flour and salt, tossing with a fork. In a parchment-lined or oiled 9-by-12-inch pan or 10-by-10-inch square pan, press the crust into the bottom evenly. Bake for 22-24 minutes, pulling it out when it looks dry and is just beginning to brown. Let cool completely at room temperature.
In a mixing bowl with an electric beater or a stand mixer, whip together the cream cheese, powdered sugar, and whipping cream and a pinch of salt. When the mixture reaches a thick, stiffer consistency, use a spatula and spread it over the crust in an even layer. Put the pan in the fridge.
In a cup or bowl, whisk together the milk and cornstarch until dissolved with no lumps. In a pan over medium heat, add the coconut milk, sugar and salt. Whisk and bring to a simmer. Slowly pour in the milk and cornstarch mixture and bring to a boil, whisking as it thickens. Cook for a few minutes until the texture is like pudding.
While it’s still hot, separate half of the pudding into a heatproof mixing bowl. Add the chocolate chips and stir together until melted. Let it cool for 20 minutes.
Spoon the chocolate haupia on top of the cream cheese layer in the pan. Chill again in the refrigerator for 45 minutes. Spoon the rest of the haupia on top of the chocolate layer. Let the dessert chill for several hours or overnight.
Before serving, whip the last cup of heavy cream with sugar until it has stiff peaks. Spread over the top of the dessert as the final layer, then sprinkle the top with mini chocolate chips or shavings.
Serve cold and store leftovers in the refrigerator.