Honolulu Star-Advertiser

Wednesday, November 20, 2024 82° Today's Paper


Live Well

What does retirement really mean?

VEASEY CONWAY/THE NEW YORK TIMES
                                Steve Shiffer, who retired as a manufacturing manager in the heavy-duty truck industry and who now has more time for motorcycle trips, in his garage, in Wake Forest, N.C., May 27, 2024.
1/2
Swipe or click to see more

VEASEY CONWAY/THE NEW YORK TIMES

Steve Shiffer, who retired as a manufacturing manager in the heavy-duty truck industry and who now has more time for motorcycle trips, in his garage, in Wake Forest, N.C., May 27, 2024.

NIC ANTAYA/THE NEW YORK TIMES
                                Madeline Lowitz, who said that she is still searching for her identity after retirement, plays a game on her tablet at her home in West Bloomfield, Mich., May 30, 2024. Readers of The New York Times submitted their stories of retirement — to share their experiences, as well as their advice.
2/2
Swipe or click to see more

NIC ANTAYA/THE NEW YORK TIMES

Madeline Lowitz, who said that she is still searching for her identity after retirement, plays a game on her tablet at her home in West Bloomfield, Mich., May 30, 2024. Readers of The New York Times submitted their stories of retirement — to share their experiences, as well as their advice.

VEASEY CONWAY/THE NEW YORK TIMES
                                Steve Shiffer, who retired as a manufacturing manager in the heavy-duty truck industry and who now has more time for motorcycle trips, in his garage, in Wake Forest, N.C., May 27, 2024.
NIC ANTAYA/THE NEW YORK TIMES
                                Madeline Lowitz, who said that she is still searching for her identity after retirement, plays a game on her tablet at her home in West Bloomfield, Mich., May 30, 2024. Readers of The New York Times submitted their stories of retirement — to share their experiences, as well as their advice.

Some see it as a state of stillness. A new chapter. The opportunity to live life rather than merely make a living. Some described it as hell. For others, it has been heaven.

We asked readers to submit their stories of retirement, and almost 1,500 of you responded.

The responses make it clear that retirement is not just one thing. It could be doing nothing, relishing quiet moments in the morning to linger over coffee or walk the dog without rushing. Or it could be an opportunity for reinvention by embracing a new focus in life — perhaps even another form of work, but one with greater satisfaction.

For some responders, retirement has meant freedom or liberation. Many considered themselves lucky. Some were frank about needing time to adjust. For at least one responder, it has been “a black hole.”

Here is a selection of your retirement stories. The responses have been lightly edited.

Kris Kruid, 65

Gallatin Gateway, Mont., and Traverse City, Mich.

“The last 10 years of my work life meant working six to seven days a week, 12-plus hours a day, building my own company. Now, retirement means waking up with a promise of hope. Alarms are only used when catching airplanes, and exploring the world is a top priority. I call myself a full-time recreationalist instead of a retiree.

“For the first year, I said yes to every invitation, got a dog and invested in some therapy. I immediately volunteered to serve on three very small nonprofit boards. I also decided to be the resource I always wished I had in business, so I volunteer to help women who want to start or further their businesses. It gives me a chance to use all of my old business skills with the added challenge of having to provide everything for free or at very little cost.

“I set the goal of making retirement look good to others and finding ways to make these chapters of my life full of adventure, rewarding interactions and opportunities to make a difference in the lives of others.”

Maria Tirado

Torrance, Calif.

“I now live in a state of stillness. I didn’t realize how much energy I spent on being ‘on.’”

Steve Shiffer, 73

Raleigh, N.C.

“I loved my career as a manufacturing manager in the heavy-duty truck industry. Last year, at age 73, I’d had enough. I have a strong desire to see what turns my life will take without full-time work. I love it!

“I have done some volunteer work. I see much more of my grandchildren and old friends who are scattered across the country. Being better connected to family and close friends has filled me with joy to a level that I had not imagined. It is very important to me that I help my daughter and her husband in raising the grandchildren.

“To put it succinctly, I want to do the things that I had to put off due to limited PTO. I have ridden my motorcycle all over the country and intend to keep doing so. My wife and I have a better relationship as we have more time together. I have read more books in the past year than in the prior five years.

“This is a very valuable time for me. I will make the most of it. I am writing this from a cabin in the Georgia mountains. Ready to hop on my motorcycle.”

Wilma Wallace, 62

Oakland, Calif.

“I’ve been retired for six months and nine days, having left my last role as a C-suite executive unexpectedly. While my retirement was certainly on the horizon, having worked steadily for 35 years since law school, my swan song was the result of a restructuring and, shall we say, a change in market conditions. Still, I embraced the change and haven’t looked back.

“Since Jan. 2, I’ve had the gift of time. Time to travel with my husband, who I may have neglected when I commuted weekly between our home in California and an amazing job in Seattle. Time to spend with my 92-year-old mother, who lives on the other coast. No more sandwiching a visit to her between business travel and sitting her down at Starbucks while I took a ‘very important’ call. …

“I’ve moved on to spending more time doing what I love: taking my morning walk with a friend and her ‘complicated dog’ who loves me almost as much as he loves her. Addressing the aches and pains caused in part by sitting at a desk for some 10 hours a day for three decades. Hopping back on the Peloton — one of the few good habits I adopted during COVID. And those postponed household remodeling jobs are almost complete.

“Is retirement my forever state? We’ll see. But I’m learning how to make the most out of this new stage. And at midyear, my self-­assessment is: ‘Exceeded expectations.’”

Madeline Lowitz

West Bloomfield, Mich.

“I am still searching! Very often there is some type of ‘formal’ training for a career. There seems to be none for retirement. After years of hard work, I suddenly had no identity! My community and purpose disappeared overnight. I was basically ‘in mourning.’ (The transition was compounded by the COVID shutdown.)

“I continue to search for a new identity, but it is difficult. I’ve been told to check out senior centers, but pumpkin carving, bingo and singalongs just don’t cut it for me. I did not lose my brain when I walked out of my office. I feel like I am just passing the time reading and doing Spelling Bee.

“Being single also complicates things a bit. I would love to explore the new area I live in, but am hesitant to go downtown at night alone or drive several hours to see the beautiful scenery in my state. It is a bit lonely.”

Conrad Reynolds

Chicago

“Growing old is a process of giving things up. The trick is to not dwell on what you have lost, but rather focus on what remains.”

Michael Olsen

Ottawa, Ontario

“Do what brings you joy. If it stops bringing you joy, find something else to do. Repeat as often as necessary.”

Andrew Tesla

Montreal

“Time, time and more time. Which is both a blessing (if you’ve prepared) and a curse (if you have not). In my case, it’s the latter. I spent a couple of years wandering around like a goldfish in a small bowl. Then things started to bloom.”

Nannette Weinhold, 61

Carbondale, Colo.

“After public school teaching middle and high school, I retired and became a pickleball coach. I initially took up the sport at the end of COVID because I was feeling isolated and alone. I have gotten pretty good for a 60-year-old, made a lot of new friends, played in numerous competitions, even traveled to Asia to play for six weeks in Thailand, Bali and Vietnam.

“My doubles partner and I got our coaches’ certification and started a business. Our mission is to empower women through the sport. Pickleball challenges in so many ways: physically, mentally, emotionally and even socially. The lessons on the court can certainly be applied in everyday life.

“I’m still teaching and helping others meet their goals and improving their quality of life. I’m the happiest I’ve been in years. Every day is like recess, just filled with play; it never feels like work.

“Recently I started coaching at an exclusive tennis club and make a nice amount of money to use for travel and tournaments, which can be costly. My dream is to purchase a sprinter van to travel around the country and spread the pickleball joy!”

Jim Barrett, 71

Minneapolis

“Retirement was a springboard! After leaving my position at a software company, I worked with AmeriCorps on a program designed to help people in recovery from opioid substance-use disorder. From that experience, my friend and I responded to the tragic opioid overdose crisis. We repurposed used newspaper boxes into Naloxone vending machines, making this lifesaving medication more accessible.

“Partnering with community hubs like churches, coffee shops and cafes, we strive to place these ‘Save a Life Stations’ where people might need them most. …

“We’re just a couple of guys, not a business or nonprofit, working to stop this tragedy. I never would have guessed I’d be doing this.”

By participating in online discussions you acknowledge that you have agreed to the Terms of Service. An insightful discussion of ideas and viewpoints is encouraged, but comments must be civil and in good taste, with no personal attacks. If your comments are inappropriate, you may be banned from posting. Report comments if you believe they do not follow our guidelines. Having trouble with comments? Learn more here.