Writing about eating disorders, or any mental illness, isn’t easy. They’re hard to understand and thus easy to judge, and sometimes the judgment can be cruel and damaging.
Why, then, am I writing about eating disorders?
I spent nearly half a lifetime fighting my own eating disorders. I know firsthand the pain and devastation they inflict on people who have them and the people around them.
Today marks the start of National Eating Disorders Awareness Week. There’s no better time to help spread the word about these potentially deadly illnesses.
Many people aren’t aware that eating disorders can be fatal, but the one-two punch of physical and psychological trauma makes death a scary possibility. According to the National Eating Disorders Association, severe malnourishment from anorexia nervosa raises the risk of organ failure; the binge-purge cycle of bulimia nervosa triggers electrolyte imbalances that can also harm organs; and binge-eating disorder can lead to Type 2 diabetes and cardiovascular issues.
Suicide is another danger. People with eating disorders often have accompanying mental illness, and for some the struggle to deal with multiple evils can be overwhelming.
It can be difficult to classify who might be susceptible to developing an eating disorder. The disorders and their variants can strike at any age and any gender.
People in recovery tend to describe an intense desire for control that becomes front and center in their lives and leads to destructive habits as they try to hold onto that feeling. How this thought process develops and gets ingrained is still not completely understood.
Chronicling my experience with eating disorders would take up far more space than this column allows. My recovery from anorexia and exercise bulimia (in which working out, not vomiting, is the “purge” in the binge-purge cycle) took many hard years.
Looking back now, I can say that I was miserable while captive to my eating disorders, even if at the time I thought I wasn’t.
Patients frequently describe eating disorders as their “friend,” the only thing they can rely on when everything else seems in disarray. That’s why eating disorders are so hard to shake, even when patients are at death’s door.
There is no magic pill or “just eat more” mantra that leads to recovery. (Pro tip: Do not use that phrase.) Effective treatment almost always combines nutrition therapy, psychotherapy and lots and lots of support. Even then, traces of disordered thinking can linger. What’s different now for me is how I react to those thoughts.
Many resources are available online to find out more about eating disorders and how to support someone suffering from one; visit nationaleatingdisorders.org.
“She Speaks” is a weekly column by the women writers of the Honolulu Star-Advertiser. Reach Celia Downes at cdownes@staradvertiser.com.
