A student of dance since she was 3, Ashley Yee nevertheless was determined to become a lawyer so she could make a lot of money — until she discovered pre-law classes weren’t much fun.
College Ready, a national program aimed at helping college students stay strong in their faith, helped her realize that "I needed God’s vision, not my own vision," and that she was meant to be a dancer, not a lawyer, Yee said in an interview.
The FamilyLife DVD series is being presented for the second time in Hawaii by Matt and Carol Tan and Troy Miyasato, Christian parents who wanted their kids to remain close to God when they left home for college.
The six-week program began June 18 at the Nuuanu YMCA and will continue at 6:30 p.m. every Tuesday through July 23. The series is designed for high school seniors going to college and offers advice on "vision, empowering friendships, excelling academically, dating right, having fun, and growing spiritually," according to www.collegeready.com.
Matt Tan, a chief circulation supervisor at the Star-Advertiser and longtime football coach at ‘Iolani School, said he and his wife initially obtained the College Ready DVD series just for their eldest son, Scott, and a few of his friends last year. But their little group "grew rapidly to 30 students from six different churches and from 10 different high schools from Oahu" when other parents heard about it through word of mouth, he said.
Tan remembered when he was a green "local boy going away to college" decades ago, totally unprepared for "things out there you’ve never seen before" and all the choices available, he said.
"The attitude (of kids) at that age is they think they’re invincible, but they don’t know what they’re walking into. Especially our son Scotty — he’s been like in an incubator, so to speak, (attending) ‘Iolani since he was in kindergarten, in just a good atmosphere," Tan said. Scott Tan attended church consistently through high school, but "just being away from the flock … you just have to make sure you’re making intentional decisions to keep your faith and know what you stand for," Matt Tan said.
"The statistics are staggering — 30 percent of college students drop out during their first year in college, and in America over 65 percent of churchgoing high school students abandon their faith and quit altogether once in college," Matt Tan said, citing information from FamilyLife. "We are trying with God’s help to reverse this trend."
The impact of the program has been "amazing," according to the testimonies of the students after the first year, he said. About 30 to 40 have registered for this year’s series, but walk-ins are welcome at any time.
Yee, a discussion facilitator for College Ready, said she switched her major from pre-law to dance in her sophomore year after attending the program and having many opportunities to dance open up to her. She will be a junior at Mills College in Oakland, Calif., this fall.
"When I started college I centered everything around making money. I was unsatisfied with every decision I made," she said.
The program "really emphasizes daily devotions to spend time with God. It’s your spiritual food to get you through the day," said Yee, who acknowledged she never made time for it before.
College Ready "made me realize who are the people I should be surrounding myself with, who are making me stronger in faith and keeping me grounded," Yee said. But the program doesn’t recommend pushing away friends who aren’t as devoted to God — "you can be the light in their life."
Students ask a lot of questions about how to handle roommates, particularly those who always urged them to join them in drinking.
Yee said she’s never had a roommate, but "I have a lot of friends that drink. So before you go out with them, you have to set boundaries and tell them: I don’t drink, but I’m not going to tell you not to drink. And they respect that decision." It’s OK that she’s often the designated driver because "I want to be that friend they can rely on."
Christian Siania, another group facilitator and a Christian youth leader, spoke about dating, relationships and having fun for the program. He studied pre-law at DePaul University in Chicago but said he recently decided to obey the "great call on my life" to become a minister.
Siania, who will pursue a master’s degree in theology, said Christians are "not called to be sorrowful people" who lead boring lives, but are called to honor God and "shine their light" as individuals while living joyfully. Many Christian kids have heard college is "all about partying and getting drunk at night," which they don’t really like to do, and worry they might become outcasts if they don’t take part, Siania said.
"We tell them there’s freedom in the Christian walk. They can go to a party and not get drunk. So there are ways to have fun and not compromise your faith. We don’t focus on the restrictions; we focus on the freedom," he said.
