It’s the last Sunday in May and time to flASHback on the month’s news that amused and confused:
>> Gov. David Ige rejected U.S. Centers for Disease Control guidance for loosening COVID-19 rules on masks and travel, but insisted he’s following the science. It depends on whether consulting the Psychic Hotline counts as science.
>> Lt. Gov. Josh Green hopes a new study linking COVID to male impotence will get vaccine skeptics off the fence. Changing minds by changing the organ they think with.
>> Mayor Rick Blangiardi kept the city in Tier 3 of COVID-19 restrictions despite case numbers saying we should be in the more restrictive Tier 2, while working on massaging the metrics to open further to Tier 4. He must fall asleep at night with tiers on his pillow.
>> Legislators denied the last-minute $2,200 bonus they voted for public school teachers was a political payoff to a powerful lobby. They had me until the $200 was tacked on for convenient 10% campaign contributions.
>> Senate Ways and Means Chairman Donovan Dela Cruz gutted the University of Hawaii’s academic budget, then diverted $42.5 million of UH building funds for a community center in his Wahiawa district. I’m sure students are happy to sacrifice their future in life for his political future.
>> The Legislature made it a crime to capture or kill sharks in Hawaii waters. Lawmakers are willing to extend sharks this professional courtesy as long as they don’t eat any major campaign donors.
>> The board of the Honolulu Authority for Rapid Transportation is taking steps to crack down on fraud and abuse. Such brilliance to close the barn door after 10 billion horses have escaped.
>> Seeking a solution for wheels on HART’s $1.4 billion rail cars that don’t fit the tracks, CEO Lori Kahikina said she’d get “all of the smart people” from HART and its contractors in the same room. That’s going to be a small room.
>> The Labor Department shut its unemployment call hub at the Hawai‘i Convention Center for pest control and left a recording telling claimants to call another office — without providing a number. Everybody knows their number: 1-800-AINOKEA.
>> Leaders of a Kaimuki church covered up a big cluster of COVID infections among congregants while spreading vaccine conspiracy theories. What’s that old saying about the quality that’s next to godliness? I’m pretty sure it’s not stupidity.
>> UH released artist renderings showing the minimalist concept of its new 9,000-seat campus football stadium. It’s designed to make players feel like they’re back in Pop Warner.
>> With reduced seating at the new football facility, UH set a priority system to decide who gets tickets. Winners of a lottery get one ticket; losers have to take two tickets.
And the quote of the month … from City Council Chairman Tommy Waters on reports the city workforce could drop 24% from retirements and unfilled vacancies: “It’s scary, downright scary to think about.” Where will his campaign sign-wavers come from?
Reach David Shapiro at volcanicash@gmail.com.