David Penhallow- Scott never seemed a particular age. He knew so much of Kauai history, which made him sound older than he was, but he was funny and clever and busy with interesting projects, which made him appear younger than his years. Penhallow-Scott managed to hover in that age group described as “distinguished,” so it was a bit of a jolt to read in his obituary that he was an actual age, 86.

Penhallow-Scott, a longtime community leader, celebrated writer and the most gracious person in any gathering, died Monday in Hilo, where he had lived for the last several years, though the island of Kauai claims him as its own. Born on Oahu in 1933, Penhallow-Scott spent much of his youth on Kauai. His mother, Anna Scott Sloggett, a descendant of the Rice family, was well known on Kauai as a beloved teacher and socialite who lived to be 106.

Penhallow-Scott got his bachelor’s degree at Stanford, where he studied history, drama and speech. He went on to earn his master’s degree in education from the University of Southern California and taught theater at Kamehameha Schools and Kauai High. He lived in New York in the 1950s and performed in off-Broadway productions. He served in the Army, worked in film and television, and eventually made his way back home to Hawaii.

His career path was incredibly varied, from serving as director of the Kauai Museum to manager of a Hanalei hotel, but no matter what he did, Penhallow-Scott’s greatest talent was how he connected with people, how he taught you things without making it feel like a lecture, how he made people feel important by listening closely to them and remembering details about their lives, how he laughed at people’s jokes even when they weren’t very funny.

In the mid-’80s he served as administrative assistant to Kauai Mayor Tony Kunimura, a brusque bruddah with a swift mouth who often needed a tactful facilitator like Penhallow-Scott to smooth things over in his wake. Between 1985-87, Penhallow-Scott reportedly resigned four times from the job, but the first three times, Kunimura convinced him to stay. Ever the diplomat, Penhallow-Scott wouldn’t say why he finally left for good, but ended any talk of disharmony in the County Building by saying, “The mayor and I are very good friends. I enjoy being with him and I like the mayor.”

Most of his life, he was known as David Penhallow, but added his mother’s maiden name, Scott, as a tribute, once he started publishing books. He authored what is considered the definitive history on Coco Palms, “The Story of the Coco Palms Hotel: The Grace Buscher Guslander Years 1953-1985,” published in 2007. Among the many adventures in his life, Penhallow-Scott was an assistant to and close confidant of Guslander, the woman who owned the famous hotel where Elvis Presley filmed “Blue Hawaii.” His book, thick with photos and filled with names, describes a hotel that belonged as much to the employees as to the guests and an era when hospitality was defined as a warm relationship between hosts and visitors.

When a person like Penhallow-Scott dies, the tendency is to think of all the knowledge that is lost with them, but in this case he was a prolific writer with a series of stage plays and historical novels as well as his nonfiction work. He documented so much of what he knew and saw. What is lost is his grace with people and how he extended his courteous goodwill to all.