It’s the last Sunday in February and time to “flASHback” on the month’s news that amused and confused:
>> Prosecutor Keith Kaneshiro is fighting attempts to force him out after being named a target of a federal corruption probe, and he wants taxpayers to foot his legal fees. It’s known in constitutional circles as the Chutzpah Clause.
>> Kaneshiro’s former deputy Katherine Kealoha, already indicted on multiple federal corruption charges, faces new accusations of selling opioids with her brother and using her position to cover up the crimes. If this keeps up, she’ll get her own spin-off of “Law &Order.”
>> Rail CEO Andrew
Robbins tried to spin a new federal criminal probe of
Honolulu’s $9.2 billion train as mere “bumps in the road.” It could only look that way from a bump on a log.
>> Facing doubts about rail’s final leg through downtown, the transit agency will pay losing bidders $1 million just for participating. It’s like having to tie a pork chop around your neck to get the dog to play with you.
>> State legislators are considering a bill to ban shark killing in Hawaii waters. They’d be the first lawmakers in the nation to display such sweeping solidarity with fellow predators.
>> The Legislature is
hearing proposals for a new $350 million Halawa stadium as part of a public-private development to include housing, hotels and retail. It’s never to soon to set the stage for the next federal grand jury.
>> Bills by state Sen. Stanley Chang and state Rep. Ryan Yamane to let Kakaako developers build towers at twice the current height were opposed by residents who complained, “Hawaii is not Dubai.” The difference is Dubai’s politics run on oil and ours run on grease.
>> Sen. Mike Gabbard is pushing a bill to require internet users to pay the state a $20 fee to access pornography. The state, already our nanny, now wants to be our madam.
>> A Missouri company is opening a bar in Kakaako featuring ax throwing, with the saying “Axes and alcohol … what could go wrong?!” It’ll be like the Legislature unwinding with a little gut-and-replace.
>> With trees down, power out and traffic signals malfunctioning from a major winter storm, Mayor Kirk Caldwell declared, “It’s all hands on deck.” It was nice to have their hands briefly out of our pockets.
>> Caldwell unveiled a seven-point plan to improve pedestrian safety with the theme “‘Look All Ways.’” If only he’d taken his own advice before he got run over by a train.
And the quote of the month … from U.S. Rep. Tulsi Gabbard after NBC News reported Russian websites are promoting
her presidential campaign: “The corporate media is
doing everything they can to stop our campaign before it gets started.” She’s branding herself as Trump Lite.
Reach David Shapiro at volcanicash@gmail.com.