Gary Cabacongan, 57, has been living with HIV for more than 15 years.
He was diagnosed with HIV in 1996 while living in California, where he worked as a roofer. Cabacongan, who was born and raised in Kaneohe, doesn’t know exactly when he picked up the virus, but says it was the result of a lifestyle that included substance abuse and sex with numerous partners.
His initial reaction was denial.
"I went home and didn’t tell nobody," Cabacongan said. "I wanted to kill myself. I continued to use drugs and alcohol."
It wasn’t until moving back to Hawaii and living at Gregory House in 2007 that he began to talk openly about his HIV with others and worked on overcoming his addictions.
KAHU MALAMA A fundraiser for Gregory House Programs:
>> Where: Leahi Club Lounge (former Hano hano Room), Sheraton Waikiki, 2255 Kalakaua Ave.
>> When: 6 to 9 p.m. Saturday
>> Cost: $100 in advance; $125 at the door
>> Info: Call 592-9022 or gregoryhouse.org/kahu-malama
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"It was a lifestyle of selfishness," he said. "I didn’t care about nobody but myself. … I was a drug addict and drug addicts do stupid things. Until I came here. This place turned me around."
He credits Gregory House Programs, a nonprofit that provides housing for those with HIV and AIDS, for helping him stay on his feet while dealing with the disease.
"The love is incredible here," said Cabacongan, who stayed at Gregory House, a transitional shelter, six years ago. "The people are here to help you. Without it I don’t know where I’d be. I’d be homeless."
Cabacongan is among the estimated 2,200 to 2,500 people in Hawaii living with HIV and AIDS in 2012, the most recent statistics available from the state Department of Health.
Last year 73 people were newly diagnosed with HIV.
"There are new people being diagnosed and testing positive each year," said Peter Whiti car, branch chief of the state’s STD/AIDS Prevention Branch.
The rise in cases is partially due to increased testing, which is important for prevention, he said. What’s tricky is that the virus can be latent in a person for many years before being diagnosed and reported.
"We know that the earlier someone can be diagnosed, the better their medical outcome," he said.
"If we can be successful getting them into medical care and treatment, then they’ll be less likely to transmit HIV to others."
Medications to treat HIV patients have improved and are more effective with fewer side effects, he said.
Gregory House Programs provides housing and support services for individuals with HIV and AIDS facing homelessness.
"Housing is health care," said Executive Director Jonathon Berliner. "Without housing it is difficult to have stability in life and maintain physical and emotional well-being when challenged with a chronic and sometimes debilitating disease like HIV/AIDS."
Besides Gregory House in Makiki, where HIV-positive patients can reside for up to two years, the group provides case management, emergency housing, rent subsidies and Foodbasket, which offers a hot lunch twice a week, distributes groceries and delivers food to clients in rural areas.
The group assists about 220 people and families every month through its various programs. Thousands, like Cabacongan, have stayed at Gregory House and moved on to independent living.
Cabacongan said he reached the lowest point in his life in 1996 when he was hospitalized unconscious for two weeks with a high fever. To doctors’ surprise, he pulled out of it.
But he admits that even after the near-death experience he continued to abuse drugs and alcohol.
"Once you have HIV, you have HIV for the rest of your life," he said. "I was angry.
I didn’t care."
It was at Gregory House where he finally came to terms with his anger and decided to live an honest life. Learning to be open about HIV and talk about it was an emotional release, he said. He also had to follow house rules and a structured program.
Staff there helped him learn to read, enroll in Alcoholics Anonymous and understand how his addictions were destroying his life.
With continued support, Cabacongan says he’s managed to stay sober and re-established relationships with his estranged mother and four sons.
"It’s so easy to fall back because it’s all over, but you have to commit to doing the right thing," he said.
Today he continues to manage his HIV with medication and regular doctor checkups. Cabacongan lives on his own in senior housing and enjoys spending time with his grandchildren.
"Gregory House is a place to come if you want to be helped," he said. "They love you until you love yourself."
For the first time since its founding 25 years ago, Berliner says Gregory House Programs is facing more than $50,000 in federal funding cuts due to sequestration.
The nonprofit is holding its annual fundraiser, Kahu Malama, on Saturday at the Sheraton Waikiki.
This year’s Kahu Malama ("caretaking guardian") awardee is Unity Church of Hawaii, which serves weekly cooked meals for residents of the program’s transitional shelters.
The event features food stations, a wine bar, a silent auction and entertainment by Mary Gutzi.