Hawaii’s most famous octogenarians were the toast of Washington as we “flASHback” on the week’s news that amused and confused:

>> Our U.S. Sens. Daniel Inouye and Daniel Akaka both celebrated their 87th birthdays this week. The birthday cake candles set off fire alarms in the U.S. Capitol that haven’t sounded since the War of 1812.

>> State legislators who support legalized gambling, including a Waikiki casino, are citing military base bingo as an example of how it could work. That’s like comparing the Hawaiian Humane Society’s kitty kennels to legalized cathouses.

>> Mayor Peter Carlisle said one of the biggest similarities between the mayor’s job and his old job of prosecuting attorney is relying on patterns to guide his decisions. That and relying on Doug Chin to do his heavy lifting for him.

>> Permits for baby luaus and other family festivities at Ala Moana Park and Magic Island could face last-minute cancellations during the APEC summit of world political leaders, the city warns. You’d think visiting politicians would appreciate having a nearby supply of babies to kiss.

>> The City Council is considering a bill that would set aside up to $75 million for artwork to improve the appearance of the city’s $5.3 billion elevated rail system. It’s the same decorating theory as putting lipstick on a pig.

>> Dean Hirata resigned as the state’s deputy budget director to become chief financial officer of Tetris Online Inc. Juggling the state budget is the perfect preparation for a game of escalating levels of grief that you can’t win.

>> Enrollment in the University of Hawaii system hit a record high of 60,519 students in the fall semester. About 10,000 of them will get the classes they need to graduate in four years.

>> A lawsuit between Kamehameha Schools and an anonymous family whose child was denied admission has been delayed while the judge figures out how family members can testify without revealing their identities. Sock puppets are always a dignified option.

>> The state Health Department expects to issue the first licenses for civil unions on Dec. 3, but couples can’t use them until the new law takes effect on Jan. 1. That’s a long time to have to keep your feet from getting cold.

>> The city declared success in its test of trucking raw sewage sludge from the overloaded Sand Island plant to Honouliuli. The stuff was disposed of in the same manner as campaign promises.

And the quote of the week … from Gov. Neil Abercrombie on President Barack Obama’s new jobs plan: “In Congress, there is division and discord. Here in Hawaii, everyone — from businesses to labor, the Legislature and Executive Branch — can come together around our New Day Plan.” You shouldn’t write reality checks you can’t cash.