Welcome to Football Fantasy Island. Here, salary and ego considerations do not exist.
In this pigskin paradise, the University of Hawaii can build a dream coaching staff. Everyone who has surfaced as a candidate to be the new head coach has agreed to do what he always demands of his players: accept whatever role assigned, for the good of the team.
Military guys know all about that, and that’s why the current Navy and Army coaches will be among those in charge (plus the fact they both played and coached at UH).
» Head coach: Ken Niumatalolo (Navy head coach). He’s youthful but experienced. Strong local ties as well as national connections. Former UH player.
In our land of illusion, he’s willing to give up around $1 million a year and substitute annual White House visits for winning the Commander-in-Chief’s trophy with congratulations for making it to the Hawaii Bowl from Gov. Neil, between bench presses at the Y.
That spread option offense can stay, but only if it produces 50-plus points a game like it did against BYU in the good old days.
» Associate head coach: Rich Miano (UH interim head coach): He has the most want-to and deepest UH roots of all announced applicants, other than George Lumpkin. His 12 years of coaching continuity at Manoa can be looked at as a plus or a minus as a permanent head coach candidate. But you can’t say he hasn’t been around, since he played 11 seasons in the NFL after starring at UH.
» Co-offensive coordinators: Norm Chow (Utah offensive coordinator) and June Jones (SMU head coach, when we last checked). Yes, in the real world this would work like Kobe and Shaq — which means it wouldn’t.
» Co-quarterbacks coaches: Ivin Jasper (Navy offensive coordinator/quarterbacks) and Nick Rolovich (UH offensive coordinator/quarterbacks). Jasper for the running game, Rolo for the passing game.
» Offensive line coach: Mike Cavanaugh (Oregon State offensive line coach). Five of Cav’s players in six years at UH were drafted by the NFL. ‘Nuff said.
» Defensive coordinator: Rich Ellerson (Army head coach). Remember the ‘Desert Swarm’ defense at Arizona? Yeah, that’s him, along with Duane Akina, Dick Tomey and Bob Wagner. And Ellerson played and coached at UH, too.
» Defensive assistant coach: Mark Banker (Oregon State defensive coordinator). He’s a heckuva recruiter, convincing lots of Hawaii high school talent to live in Corvallis, Ore., for four or five years.
» Defensive assistant coach: Brian Norwood (Baylor associate head coach/safeties). Like Niumatalolo, he’s got Radford and UH playing roots. Now he can say his charges helped prepare Robert Griffin III for the Heisman. Does the former Penn State assistant use Joe Paterno as a reference?
» Special teams coordinator and linebackers coach: Brian Cabral (Colorado linebackers coach). Another guy who plucks away Hawaii-grown prep talent. Plus he’s considered one of the best linebacker coaches around. Played in the Super Bowl, too.
» Defensive backs coach: Duane Akina (Texas assistant head coach/defensive backs). Here’s a true story: After Longhorns Michael Huff and Aaron Ross won back-to-back Thorpe Awards for best DB in the nation, Huff had a copy of the trophy made and presented it to Akina, his position coach.
» Coach emeritus: George Lumpkin (UH director of player personnel). There should always be a place for someone who’s done everything from playing corner 41 years ago to shooting video to serving as head coach when Jones got in that nasty car wreck.
Reach Dave Reardon at dreardon@staradvertiser.com or 529-4783.
