Question: My son has suffered from mental illness for a long time. I have tried to get him into all sorts of programs, but he doesn’t want to do it. I have become very isolated from my old friends, but one who stuck with us says I need to start working on myself because at least I can control that. … But I don’t really know where to look for help because I am not the one with the mental illness.
Answer: Try NAMI Hawaii, an affiliate of the National Alliance on Mental Illness. This nonprofit organization offers free programs that assist family caregivers and other relatives of the mentally ill. Programs are available on Oahu, Maui, Kauai and the island of Hawaii.
Among the possibilities are a free 12-week course for family caregivers of individuals with severe mental illness that is designed to help you and others in your situation cope effectively and advocate for your loved ones. The program, called Family-to-Family (F2F) Education, consists of weekly 2-1/2-hour sessions.
New classes begin on Oahu on Sept. 16, scheduled on Saturdays from 9:30 a.m. to noon at the NAMI office in Honolulu. You must register by phone or email to attend this class; for more information call 591-1297 or email info@namihawaii.org.
Another option is a NAMI Hawaii Family Support Group, a more casual, drop-in gathering for people who assist relatives who have mental-health challenges. You’ll find a confidential place to talk about your experiences, understood by others in similar circumstances; attendance is free.
Parents and other family members generally gain a sense of hope, shared commitment, wisdom and camaraderie by getting together once a month, said Greg Knudsen, a NAMI Hawaii volunteer and co-facilitator. “It helps to know they’re not alone,” he said.
You mentioned that you live in Honolulu, but did not specify a neighborhood. Check 808ne.ws/namisup (or call the Honolulu office) for a schedule of Oahu support groups, which meet regularly in Aina Haina, Pearl City, Manoa, Wahiawa and Kailua. If you happen to live in East Oahu, the Family Support Group meets tonight (the first Thursday of the month), from 7 to 8:30 p.m. in the small chapel at Holy Nativity Church, 5286 Kalanianaole Highway. Contact Knudsen at 395-3725 or knudsen123@gmail.com for more information.
We hope that following your friend’s advice ultimately benefits both you and your son, as you connect with more community resources. Good luck.
Q: This isn’t a question, but I hope you will print it. Please tell people to take pictures or videos of their stuff. It’s so easy to do on a smartphone and still people don’t do it. Seeing all those ruined homes in Houston reminded me of this.
A: The Internal Revenue Service agrees with you, advising taxpayers to document the contents of their homes, especially valuable items. Photographs or video will make it easier to claim insurance or tax benefits if a natural disaster strikes, it says. Be sure to safeguard the documentation, ideally outside the potential disaster zone. The IRS also has a workbook, Publication 584, that helps taxpayers compile a room-by-room list of possessions. Find it at 808ne.ws/irsdis.
Mahalo
On Sept. 2 at the University of Hawaii football game, I experienced a tachycardia/dehydration episode. The EMTs at the Aloha Stadium were very nice and helpful. It was the first time I ever experienced a health issue there, and they were very quick to respond to help me. I felt a little embarrassed but they made me feel better. I wanted to thank them and also the person who was passing by and offered me a bottle of water. It’s nice to be reassured that there is a lot of aloha out there. — A grateful UH fan
Write to “Kokua Line” at Honolulu Star-Advertiser, 7 Waterfront Plaza, Suite 210, 500 Ala Moana Blvd., Honolulu 96813; call 529-4773; fax 529-4750; or email kokualine@staradvertiser.com.
